That's them under the blue umbrella. She has to have a young stud muffin with her to carry all that beach gear back and forth. Spousal unit is the one that tagged her as a "cougar". Ya gotta be one to spot one, ya know!
I loaded up my beach cart and off I went to get a head start. Spousal unit wouldn't be far behind. I push the elevator button, and I'm waiting my turn, since there are over 22 floors in the building and 4 elevators. Finally, the door opens, and there stands this gal in nothing but a string bikini! For a second there, I thought I was on "Let's make a deal"! Still not sure what her face looked like, but I could spot that body anywhere! Next thing I know, the dang door done re-shut, leaving me and my beach cart behind. Spousal unit comes around the corner, then asks me "what are you grinning about"? Nuthin, nuthin at all!
We take the elevator down with a young teen. He is already showing signs of early rebellion, displaying a couple of tattoos, and both of his ears were gaged. We get to the beach floor, and apparently his family was waiting for him to help with the beach wagon that was loaded down. The sista had that look, of "where have you been"? I took a look at her, and just shook my head. She had a head full of dreads, the closer you looked the nastier the picture became. I could only imagine what the parents looked like. Get to the beach, and there they are. Something like a throwback to the hippie sixties. You could definitely tell that there had been some inbreeding going on!
It being late in the Beaching season on a Sunday, there are plenty of spots to pick from. I finally mark my spot next to Cougar and cub. They were fun yesterday, so why not go for two in a row?
Before long, here comes the Bachelor party boys. You could tell that they weren't keeping up their pace from the past few days. They were having the breakfast of champions, Bud Light at 10:00 a.m.!
The wind was pretty stiff all day, so I waited a bit to open the umbrellas. The trick here is to have the umbrella as low as possible, to avoid the wind tearing up the umbrella, or sending it flying down the beach.
It was finally Rita time. I stuck my trusty ole sand spike into the sugary sand, added my new Wyndham cup, and it was time for my slushy treat"
There is just something about a frozen margarita on the beach. You end up sucking out all the liquid, for a quick little buzz, then you have all those ice crystals left to keep you refreshed, until you get that dreaded brain freeze!
It was quite humorous to keep my eyes on the Cougar & Cub. Seemed like he had a never ending supply of beer bottles coming out of his handy tote cooler. Occasionally the Cougar would require the necessary greasing with lotion. The boy must have gotten bored with his chore, because the next thing you know, he pulls her top down and applies a big squirt of lotion! She jumps! He dodges a backhand, and I am cracking up! Not something I would try at home, not if I want to live!
One lady took it upon herself to start feeding the birds. Before you knew it, the beach was covered in gulls and pigeons. I stayed tucked under my umbrella, reading my Steve Yarbrough novel, dodging the eventual bird dropping event. Will people ever learn????
Spent the night cooking a turkey for sammaches for the rest of the week. Easiest way is to cut off the leg quarters, doctor everything up, and bake that sucker on 250 for about 4-5 hours. Make sure the temp gets to at least 180 degrees.
This sucker is just falling apart!
Tried to watch the VMA's but that was a waste of time, between Miley Sorryass's "performance", and the spousal units disappointment in only seeing NStink perform just one song, to the awlful job being done by the hosts, to Jimmy Fallen's epic introduction of Justin Woodtimber!
Turkey finally got done, and I was off to bed. Woke up this morning to find that God had painted a beginning for a wonderful day:
Life is good ya'll. Make every day special!
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