Game Day Notes - Oxford

A few notes and observations from Game Day Oxford:

1.  Short dresses and knee high boots are all the rage at the Grove.  Remember, that "cool outfit" will be even cooler when the sun goes down.

2.  Sorry honey, that cute dress you decided to wear today, all white, in mid October will have the sorority fashion police on you lickety split.  Probably why you were sitting home alone on bid day.

3.  Some of these dresses you girls are wearing to games are totally engineered wrong.  When you are walking up those stadium steps, tugging on that short hemline to keep it down, yes your boobies are gonna pop out the top!  And the reverse is true!  I almost missed a play or two because of you!

4.  Those short sleeve dry fit shirts come in handy in the heat of the afternoon.  Those night cool breezes start cutting right through you by the 4th quarter.

5.  To the lady that was so confused, she couldn't locate her seat, Section 1, row F, seat 29, is not located in section F, row 29, seat 29.  You are not seated on the home side 30 yard line.  My dear you are on the opposite end of the stadium, in the bowl, diagonal to the corner of the end zone.  How did you ever make it to Oxford????

6. Reaction of  Tennessee fans busted for carrying a case of beer:  "what do you mean I've got to pop every top and pour it all out???? . Welcome to the number one party school of the South.  You must research the rules of a foreign land before entering!

7.  Why does the guy and his pal sitting behind me have to sound so much like "Gary and Vern" the entire game?  Each of your knee jerk reactions to plays on the field that lead you to make stupid off base commentary got real old after the first quarter.  {Announcer said "2nd and 15 yards to go."  Incomplete pass.  Announcer says "3rd and 14."  Yard marker has not moved.  You say "how did they gain a yard?". Must be that common core math.....

8.  To Ole Miss Concessions:  you need to rotate cup colors.  The student section is killing yourcubeiness by bringing in last week's refillable cup!

9.  Hello Rebel fans with those igloo rolling cube coolers:  retire it soon.  It is too top heavy when loaded down with ice and beer.  Soon at you hit the curb with it, over it goes, spilling the contents out into the street, right in front of the University PoPo.  Yes, you will have to empty the contents.  Seen it way too many times already.

10.  Where in the hell is Elvis?????  Last year somebody hired him for every game.  This year, nothing.  Rumor has it that he works at the Oxford Walmart as his day job.  Somebody, hire him!