I'm the New 60!

Well, back in September,  I hit the magic number of 60!  But hey, I'm not your momma and daddy's 60, I'm the youngest of the young 60!  Or so I thought......

At my last doctor's visit, back in June, he said, well, "now that you will be 60, it's time for another colonoscopy! "  Good God!  Have 10 years passed by that quickly???

So, before the year was out, I scheduled and had my "procedure".  Forget the gallon jug, referred to as "go lightly", I'm all about the mini-prep!  Just 5 ounces of that awful stuff, plus a bunch of water.  I even took the time to read the side effects, a bunch of medical lingo, etc... and possibly of kidney stones.

Three days after the procedure, I'm at Home Depot, doing my grill assembly gig.  Then it hits me!  When you have had as many stones as I've had, you know the symptoms of kidney stones!   Fortunately I was able to handle the pain, and eventually it made it to my bladder.  Had to have been an itsy bitty one!

A few weeks later it was time for my sixth month checkup.  During the blood draw the dang tech had to stick me twice to hit a vein!  That has never happened to me before!  "Now that you're 60......."

In the Doctors office, I hear a knock at the door.  A young, attractive, 28, single "physician's assistant trainee" enters the room.  I know all that, because "at my age" I can get away with asking that!  She goes through all the lab work results, then she hits me with the big one!  "Now that you are 60, you need to consider the shingles vaccine, and the pneumonia shot, in addition to your annual flu shot".  I fired back, "whoa!  Let's back this up to 59.5!  I even told the Doctor about how mean she had been to me before he entered the room!

At home one night, I accidentally dropped my laptop, splitting the power supply port. I've never dropped my laptop like that before! No replacement part, had to move my stuff to another box, at a cost of $200!

Then, recently, I dropped my cell phone in the driveway.  In slow motion, I saw the phone pop out of its protective case, and land face down on the concrete.  Picked it up, yep, cracked!  Another drop, and another $200 to replace half the phone since I'm still under contract! Now that you're 60......

To make this 60+ thang worse, my boss had an 20+ yr old employee complaining about all the work he had scheduled that week.  The boss then proceeds to tell him about his 65 year old employee that does this and more without any help.  I said 65???  He said it sounded better than 60!

The next week I was in Roses, doing assembly.  I went to the cashier to buy a Powerade.  I noticed that she rang it up as a discount.  I'm  thinking, wow, she just gave me a 10% employee discount!  I then look at the ticket, and it was a senior citizens discount!!!  Wait a dang minute!  I do not feel that old!!!!  Now that you're 60.......

So, I feel like I'm the new 60!  Young at heart, and I can out build most of our new hires.  But at every opportunity,  the old 60 keeps raising it's ugly head!

I just hope I can make it to spring.  With that margarita machine of mine and that swimming pool at the Condo in that town up north, hopefully all those cute coeds can get me back into the "new 60 frame of mind!"