There are a few times in your life when you have to come face to face with your most feared and dreaded moments. They come early and life and they continue to follow you throughout your life, up to the point where you ultimately get the call to meet the maker.
I had one yesterday, but here are a few that I'm sure all the boys and men have either encountered, or will eventually meet:
1. That first belt whipping. You dread it, you know its coming, and there is nothing you can do to stop it. Running away or hiding are not the answer, because you will be found. Then it comes, it hurts, but when its over, you think, gee, the anticipation was a whole lot worse than the punishment.
2. That first time to whip your child. You dread it, you know that it is the only option. You have to get his attention, hoping it will be the first and last. Once you get past the first lick, the rest come easy. And, somehow, you know when to stop. Matthew must have told Morgan about it, because I was never given the opportunity to do it again.
3. That first kiss. You have always been pecked on growing up as a child. You get to pre-teen and discover that girls don't just play with dolls. Wow, they grow up too! You find out that the other guys in the class have actually kissed a girl, on the mouth! You finally get the courage, find the right girls, the right moment, and bam! You've done it! But, you aren't really sure what you did! She runs away threatening to tell somebody, and then you get the fear of that dreaded whipping again!
4. First official date, driving, dinner & a movie and back. My first solo adventure with someone I barely knew was in community college. It was a red head. It was something about that red hair. Nobody warned me about what comes with the hair. She lived in another town, so I picked a weekend when I knew she would be home. I tried doing all the "right things". I sent her flowers, a dozen roses. I asked her if she got them, response was "yep, they came in a box, still had thorns on them and the wires were just laying in the box". Still, there was that red hair. I picked her up to take her to dinner. She hugged the passenger door. Got to the restaurant, boy could that girl eat, the most expensive thing on the menu! But still, there was that red hair! Went to a move, an action flick, on the screen, no where else.... Time to take her home, stuck the key into the ignition upside down. Took forever to get it unstuck. But still, there was that red hair. I'm guessing her patience was running thin. That red hair bled into her face, and the out of her mouth, "take me home". Yes ma'm!
Needless to say, I did not even have to reach for the door handle. She was at her front door faster that I could get out the words "let me walk....).
5. Will you marry me. These are not the four most dreaded words, they anticipation of the answer is by far the biggest fear in a man's life. What if she says NO? I thought about it, and thought about it. Funny thing, I knew she was the one for me after the first date. To test the waters, I even visited her mom a few times at her work and took her a flower. Finally, I had a plan. I waited until she was a bit distracted. She was doing cross stitch project for a gift. While she was stitching, I stood up, fearing that needle, and hit her with "will you marry me"? Without missing a stitch, she said "yes" and continued on. She was and is one cool cookie!
6. Babies. You find out you are gonna be a Daddy. Got to be honest, I actually had sympathy symptoms during the whole first pregnancy. LaNelle got put to bed because of her blood pressure weeks before the due date, and the worry meter went even higher. I was making a homemade pizza the night she went into labor, and haven't made one since.
7. Dad, I need to talk to you. Oh great, "I hope it is something penicillin can cure" goes through your mind. Son spent his junior and senior high school years at the Mississippi School for Math and Science. He is a senior. The friend girl is a junior. "Dad, she wants to live together when we get to MSU". I look at him. Son: Your freshman year at MSU you are required to life in the dorm. Your sophomore year she will be required to live in the dorm, So, we don't even need to be having this conversation until you are a junior. Guess what, he is now a junior.......
8. "Retirement". Been working at a job I'd been enjoying for 15 years. It was a little like family. You work hard and you play hard. You know about each others families. Then things change. New guy in town. You begin to hate going to work. You can't eat, you can't sleep. You go to the doctor for a magic pill. Communication is nonexistent. Finally, after several years of this, you wake up to the realization that you are in a depression . You decide that you have reached a point in your life where you need to make a change. Soon as busy season is over, job market here I come. Then one Friday afternoon, you find out that you are "retired". Wow. This happens to other people, not me. As I pulled out of the parking lot, I suddenly realize somebody just did me a favor. Almost wish I could have said thank you.
9. What do you do now? Got to admit , was not sure about this one. Eventually, I began volunteering at my church, took up several hobbies, began looking for part time work, and still looking. Blessed with a supportive soul mate and two wonderful boys. Can't complain one bit!
10. What does the future hold? I'm not sure. I'm still looking for that one thing to help occupy my time. Enjoying life and hoping the money holds out.
FDR once said, "the only thing to fear, is fear itself." He was right. Enjoy what you do. Life is far too short to live it any other way!
Retired in 2012. I'm trying to out run old age and boredom. So far, I'm winning the race!
Monday, November 11, 2013
Friday, November 8, 2013
Burrr!
God has blessed us with the four seasons, spring, summer, fall and winter. I love to watch everything turn green in the spring. It is amazing to watch seeds that have germinated suddenly jump out of cracks in the ground and grow into full mature plants. Flip flop wearing is in full swing and all of my shorts and Hawaiian shirts now get to feel the sunshine. As spring turns into summer, excitement grows for trips to the beach. As summer starts to cool off a bit, you begin to faintly see different shades of color begin to appear in the trees. Then all of a sudden, the cold snaps hit you like a ton of bricks! Why I hate winter:
1. Too damn cold!
2. Toes get cold in desperate attempts to continue wearing flip flops
3. When I get up in the morning, nothing I hate worse then sliding into my leather recliner and get that cold sensation running up my spine as I attempt to sit down. Worse than entering an ice cold swimming pool
4. The toilet seat is too cold!
5. The dew that settles in on my windshield turns to ice.
6. Grocery stores are emptied at the first threat of an ice storm that is gone in 2 days
7. At the first sign of winter it is clear that college football is winding down
8. All the pretty girls finally put on clothes
9. All my buddies have headed for the woods, me, too damn cold!
10. Spousal unit yells "get those cold feet away from me"!
1. Too damn cold!
2. Toes get cold in desperate attempts to continue wearing flip flops
3. When I get up in the morning, nothing I hate worse then sliding into my leather recliner and get that cold sensation running up my spine as I attempt to sit down. Worse than entering an ice cold swimming pool
4. The toilet seat is too cold!
5. The dew that settles in on my windshield turns to ice.
6. Grocery stores are emptied at the first threat of an ice storm that is gone in 2 days
7. At the first sign of winter it is clear that college football is winding down
8. All the pretty girls finally put on clothes
9. All my buddies have headed for the woods, me, too damn cold!
10. Spousal unit yells "get those cold feet away from me"!
Thursday, November 7, 2013
Road Tripping Through Corinth
Spousal unit had a scheduled trip to Corinth, MS to teach an all day class, so being the chauffeur that I am, off we go!
Corinth is not a town you go "through". You have to go to there, up hwy 25 to Starkville, then over to hwy 45 up to Tupelo and then to your final destination of Corinth.
Russell Beef House:
Before checking into the hotel, we made a dinner detour to Russell's Beef House, known for their "world famous salad bar", according to the digital advertising sign out from.
After walking in to Russell's you get your choice of seating. Right off you see the fire pit where literally everything is cooked except for French fries and the aforementioned salad bar. Note above the grill stated "watch out for flying taters! We decided to sit in the back corner in case one of those taters took flight.
Menu was pretty simple, a one sided sheet, beef being the most prominent food item. Decided on the sirloin fer two. That " world famous salad bar" was hardly the attraction advertised out front. But, that was not why we were there! We ordered it mediim, got to remember to say medium rare in the future. That sucker was 32 ounces of sirloin, with the biggest piece of grilled beef fat on the side. My Pops would be envious!
Steak was a bit overdone, but still, very tasty. Spousal unit dipped her bites into two sauces on the table, one being that flavor killer called Heinz 57. Done, off to the hotel we went.
Hampton Inn:
Just love being a Hilton Gold Card member, comes from that timeshare purchase years ago. Membership gets you free internet, a snack and a drink at check in. Good bed, hot shower and of course that complementary breakfast in the morning.
Went for a quick bite before dropping the spousal unit off at her seminar site. Finished eating my cereal, when the kitchen lady approached our table and said "I'll take your bawl" if you're done with it. I was like, huh, then she said "bowl"! Got a good laugh out of that. They sure do speak a different language up here in NE Mississippi!
Friend Debbie at the next table mentioned a place called "Babe's that had famous biscuits. She quickly corrected me and said it was Abe's. I was already hooked, had to go there next!
Super KMart:
Last KMart I was in was I Gulfport and it was in the last stages of closure. This one was hot for the picking! Picked up two Halloween costumes 70% off for me and my buddy Kelly. Kelly has a preacher permit, and we figured that with the two Monk priest outfits I got for $6, we could set up a storage she'll behind St. Marks and start their 4th ministry, flip flops required for admission!
Abe's Grill:
Abe's is one of those places you would find on "Diners, Drive ins and Dives". The outside is covered in so Mich memorabilia, it just invites you to come I'm. Its a small place with counter seating and a one seater unisex bathroom. The door at the end of the counter leads to the walk on cooler, where everything is stored. The grill probably had am inch of baked on grease on it that gives everything its unique grilled on flavor.
Abe asked me what'll I have? Said I wanted one of his world famous biscuits. He said, with his back to me "no, two!" While holding up two fingers! "Whatcha want on it"? I hesitated, he said "OK, ham it will be". Lady asked "whatcha drinking"? I said water. She gave me iced tea! I have officially fallen in love with the place!
Next customer asked for a breakfast plate. Abe says "I'm done with breakfast, pick something else. They decide on a BBQ sammich. Next customer comes in and gets a breakfast plate. Abe says they phoned their order in from Memphis. Still not sure there was actually a phone in there. Boy, felt lucky to get my biscuit(s) (plus ham and sweet tea!)
Wood Carver:
While riding up and down hwy 72 looking for some distraction, I came across a shed labeled "Wood Carvings". There were all sizes of tree trunks scattered on the grounds. A work in progress was a bear, standing, with a cub at its side. I couldn't help but think it was gonna be a statue for "the school up north_ in honor of their new team mascot, the Black Bear!
Slugburger:
They always say, when in a new town, eat what the
Locals eat. The spousal unit had mentioned the local food item was a "slugburger" and there was even a festival named after it. Before hitting the sack, i did my research, using that free internet. It is supposed to be ground beef, with a filler, that is deep fried.
While riding around, I found the "Slugburger Cafe". I entered the building and immediately was in a stare down with three of the wait staff. Guessing they smelled Abe's Grill on me. I sat down and said "I'm here for a slugburger". Waitress says, "OK, comes with mustard, pickle and onion". Said OK, but drop the pickle, add cheese, fries and a diet coke. Felt like I was taking the order. Again, must a been the smell from Abe's!
Slugburger is nothing to write home about, 99% fried filler. Funny thing is, everyone that walked thru the door was ordering them. And you guessed it, they got the friendly smile treatment that somehow I had missed out on-Abe's!
While I struggled to get that slugburger down with my canned diet coke, I began to listen. One feller mentioned that the plant had just finished putting in an electric fence. Said "them boys that drink beer after work on the back lot got a rude awakening coming". Visual: Bubba peeing over in the corner, accidentally hitting that electric fence!
On the other side was a lady talking about receiving a debit card for her to get to fer 401k retirement. Said she gets charged $2 on every transaction, and when she called customer service, the representative one the lone didn't speak English! All she wanted was to put cash into her checking account, but the card kept rejecting every time she tried to transfer the money. She had me cracking up with every sentence. I kept my composure, but was real tempted to ask her if she had signed up for Obummercare!
Corinth is not a town you go "through". You have to go to there, up hwy 25 to Starkville, then over to hwy 45 up to Tupelo and then to your final destination of Corinth.
Russell Beef House:
Before checking into the hotel, we made a dinner detour to Russell's Beef House, known for their "world famous salad bar", according to the digital advertising sign out from.
After walking in to Russell's you get your choice of seating. Right off you see the fire pit where literally everything is cooked except for French fries and the aforementioned salad bar. Note above the grill stated "watch out for flying taters! We decided to sit in the back corner in case one of those taters took flight.
Menu was pretty simple, a one sided sheet, beef being the most prominent food item. Decided on the sirloin fer two. That " world famous salad bar" was hardly the attraction advertised out front. But, that was not why we were there! We ordered it mediim, got to remember to say medium rare in the future. That sucker was 32 ounces of sirloin, with the biggest piece of grilled beef fat on the side. My Pops would be envious!
Steak was a bit overdone, but still, very tasty. Spousal unit dipped her bites into two sauces on the table, one being that flavor killer called Heinz 57. Done, off to the hotel we went.
Hampton Inn:
Just love being a Hilton Gold Card member, comes from that timeshare purchase years ago. Membership gets you free internet, a snack and a drink at check in. Good bed, hot shower and of course that complementary breakfast in the morning.
Went for a quick bite before dropping the spousal unit off at her seminar site. Finished eating my cereal, when the kitchen lady approached our table and said "I'll take your bawl" if you're done with it. I was like, huh, then she said "bowl"! Got a good laugh out of that. They sure do speak a different language up here in NE Mississippi!
Friend Debbie at the next table mentioned a place called "Babe's that had famous biscuits. She quickly corrected me and said it was Abe's. I was already hooked, had to go there next!
Super KMart:
Last KMart I was in was I Gulfport and it was in the last stages of closure. This one was hot for the picking! Picked up two Halloween costumes 70% off for me and my buddy Kelly. Kelly has a preacher permit, and we figured that with the two Monk priest outfits I got for $6, we could set up a storage she'll behind St. Marks and start their 4th ministry, flip flops required for admission!
Abe's Grill:
Abe's is one of those places you would find on "Diners, Drive ins and Dives". The outside is covered in so Mich memorabilia, it just invites you to come I'm. Its a small place with counter seating and a one seater unisex bathroom. The door at the end of the counter leads to the walk on cooler, where everything is stored. The grill probably had am inch of baked on grease on it that gives everything its unique grilled on flavor.
Abe asked me what'll I have? Said I wanted one of his world famous biscuits. He said, with his back to me "no, two!" While holding up two fingers! "Whatcha want on it"? I hesitated, he said "OK, ham it will be". Lady asked "whatcha drinking"? I said water. She gave me iced tea! I have officially fallen in love with the place!
Next customer asked for a breakfast plate. Abe says "I'm done with breakfast, pick something else. They decide on a BBQ sammich. Next customer comes in and gets a breakfast plate. Abe says they phoned their order in from Memphis. Still not sure there was actually a phone in there. Boy, felt lucky to get my biscuit(s) (plus ham and sweet tea!)
Wood Carver:
While riding up and down hwy 72 looking for some distraction, I came across a shed labeled "Wood Carvings". There were all sizes of tree trunks scattered on the grounds. A work in progress was a bear, standing, with a cub at its side. I couldn't help but think it was gonna be a statue for "the school up north_ in honor of their new team mascot, the Black Bear!
Slugburger:
They always say, when in a new town, eat what the
Locals eat. The spousal unit had mentioned the local food item was a "slugburger" and there was even a festival named after it. Before hitting the sack, i did my research, using that free internet. It is supposed to be ground beef, with a filler, that is deep fried.
While riding around, I found the "Slugburger Cafe". I entered the building and immediately was in a stare down with three of the wait staff. Guessing they smelled Abe's Grill on me. I sat down and said "I'm here for a slugburger". Waitress says, "OK, comes with mustard, pickle and onion". Said OK, but drop the pickle, add cheese, fries and a diet coke. Felt like I was taking the order. Again, must a been the smell from Abe's!
Slugburger is nothing to write home about, 99% fried filler. Funny thing is, everyone that walked thru the door was ordering them. And you guessed it, they got the friendly smile treatment that somehow I had missed out on-Abe's!
While I struggled to get that slugburger down with my canned diet coke, I began to listen. One feller mentioned that the plant had just finished putting in an electric fence. Said "them boys that drink beer after work on the back lot got a rude awakening coming". Visual: Bubba peeing over in the corner, accidentally hitting that electric fence!
On the other side was a lady talking about receiving a debit card for her to get to fer 401k retirement. Said she gets charged $2 on every transaction, and when she called customer service, the representative one the lone didn't speak English! All she wanted was to put cash into her checking account, but the card kept rejecting every time she tried to transfer the money. She had me cracking up with every sentence. I kept my composure, but was real tempted to ask her if she had signed up for Obummercare!
Wednesday, November 6, 2013
Gonna Need a Bigger Trap
The last week or so we have been hearing "those noises". You don't typically hear them during the day or early at night. After you have gone to bed, and have fallen into a nice deep sleep. Then all of a sudden you hear a noise coming from the kitchen, but its too dark to see. What if its something bigger than you want to handle in the wee hours of the night???
For a little while, I thought it might be Oscar, doing his nightly roam about the house, getting a snack, sip of water, and of course, leaving a prize. While cleaning out the laundry room, the spousal unit came across one of those noise makers. Fortunate for her, (and me!) this one was DOA. After getting a closer look, it was either a mouse on steroids or a field rat. Posted a picture of FB, and the consensus was all R A T!
Early this morning I heard those noises again! Got up, went into the kitchen without turning on the light. I sat down in my recliner (with feet up!) and waited in the dark for the next sound. It wasn't long before I heard it again! Room was still dark, and my intuition was telling me to wait for sunrise, after all, vampires always disappear before the sun comes up, maybe it works on mice and rats!
The sun finally came up. Whew! I sat there a while longer, then out of the corner of my eye, scooting across the floor was one of those little noise makers! After seeing that it wasn't a full fledged rat sized critter, I was determined to get the traps, that I had bought yesterday, set and laid out in hopes of hitting them wham, bam, thank you ma'am!
I put one under the sink, one in the cabinet, one near the dog food storage bin, and one in the laundry room. It wasn't long before one of the traps snapped. No mouse, so I figured that Oscar must have gotten curious and set it off. I knew it wouldn't hurt him too bad after having one go off on my finger.
About an hour later, I hear the one go off under the sink. The trap when Bam, with no flipping and no flopping. I opened the door to find the trap laying to one side, and a large mouse laying about six inches away from the trap. I saw a little movement in his feet, and quickly went for the hand grabbers and grabbed him up! The trap apparently knocked him out cold. Got him outside, and I knock him out permanently!
I have seen videos on Facebook showing super mice, doing strength training with rat traps and thought the videos were really funny. Never in my wildest imagination did I ever dream that one day they would invade my house!
Time for a bigger mouse trap!.......
one of three rat traps
For a little while, I thought it might be Oscar, doing his nightly roam about the house, getting a snack, sip of water, and of course, leaving a prize. While cleaning out the laundry room, the spousal unit came across one of those noise makers. Fortunate for her, (and me!) this one was DOA. After getting a closer look, it was either a mouse on steroids or a field rat. Posted a picture of FB, and the consensus was all R A T!
Early this morning I heard those noises again! Got up, went into the kitchen without turning on the light. I sat down in my recliner (with feet up!) and waited in the dark for the next sound. It wasn't long before I heard it again! Room was still dark, and my intuition was telling me to wait for sunrise, after all, vampires always disappear before the sun comes up, maybe it works on mice and rats!
The sun finally came up. Whew! I sat there a while longer, then out of the corner of my eye, scooting across the floor was one of those little noise makers! After seeing that it wasn't a full fledged rat sized critter, I was determined to get the traps, that I had bought yesterday, set and laid out in hopes of hitting them wham, bam, thank you ma'am!
 |
| Three of four mouse traps |
I put one under the sink, one in the cabinet, one near the dog food storage bin, and one in the laundry room. It wasn't long before one of the traps snapped. No mouse, so I figured that Oscar must have gotten curious and set it off. I knew it wouldn't hurt him too bad after having one go off on my finger.
About an hour later, I hear the one go off under the sink. The trap when Bam, with no flipping and no flopping. I opened the door to find the trap laying to one side, and a large mouse laying about six inches away from the trap. I saw a little movement in his feet, and quickly went for the hand grabbers and grabbed him up! The trap apparently knocked him out cold. Got him outside, and I knock him out permanently!
I have seen videos on Facebook showing super mice, doing strength training with rat traps and thought the videos were really funny. Never in my wildest imagination did I ever dream that one day they would invade my house!
Time for a bigger mouse trap!.......
Sunday, November 3, 2013
Critters
Living next to a wooded area has some bonuses that are not found in more suburban areas. Through the years we have seen our share of animals come out of the woods for one reason or another. We have had our share of deer running through the yard, turkeys doing their strut, foxes on the hunt, and even a hawk or two trying to make a meal out of one of the neighborhood pups!
As the neighborhood has grown, a series of fences were put up, mostly for privacy. Now almost every yard is surrounded by fencing. Sightings of natures animals have become fewer and fewer. Now, instead of seeing the graceful run of the deer and such, we get the night critters and other varmints.
Bullfrog:
I have had fish ponds that I have attempted to raise Koi and goldfish. The fish have come and gone, mostly from visits from the "night critters". Occasionally, I get my fare share of tadpoles. Some of these actually make it to the frog stage. After dark, these frogs get to singing, and at times loudly.
Ole Henry Dog is a curious fellow. He loves to chase anything that moves. Spiders, lizards, birds, and squirrels. One day he discovered something moving in the flower beds near the fish ponds. Low and behold, Henry has found my resident bullfrog. Henry got to digging, and sniffing, until he finally cornered that frog. Henry got him by the hind leg and drug him out into the open. Playtime! That frog never had a chance! Henry would grab him, then sling him up into the air, and then give chase!
A bullfrog is one of the hardest critters to actually kill. Been frogging a few times in my youth, with gigs and 22 rifles. End up catching a bunch, and they would all be alive till the very end of giving up their hind quarters. Somehow Ole Henry Dog was able to put this one out of his misery pretty quickly. The frog's revenge was making Henry foam at the mouth. After seeing this ole dog foam, I just about fell onto the ground from my uncontrolled laughter!
Squirrel:
If you live near some woods and you like to feed the birds, then more than likely you will have a run in with your share of squirrels. I had a family take up residence in my attic. They are determined little varmints, and they will find a way. I was determined to rid myself of these pesky critters!
On a shopping trip to Harbor Freight, I came across some varmint traps. Not wanting to spend a lot of money, I bought two of the small ones for about $15. I figured once a squirrel got into to one that he would be too dumb to figure out how to get out. Wrong! After a couple of weeks, all my bait was gone and no squirrels. I then had the idea to add another spring to the trap door, surely that would hold a trapped squirrel.
The next morning, I took Ole Henry Dog out for our morning ritual of finding a bush for him and me. I work my way over to side of the yard where I had set the trap. I'll be dang, the trap had a squirrel in it! I called for Henry and he came a running. We stood there, staring at each other, me and Henry looking at the squirrel, and the squirrel looking back at us. It was like a standoff in the old west, who would make the first move? All of a sudden, that pesky ole squirrel charged the trap door to the cage. The door busted open, and the squirrel literally took flight, landing on a nearby crepe myrtle, and up the tree, and over the fence he went. He left Ole Henry Dog and me just standing there, looking at each other, trying to figure out what just happened! Henry gave me that look of "well, I guess you better get a bigger trap". I started laughing, and I think Henry did too!
Eventually I did go and get me a bigger trap. Me, Henry and Oscar had quite a summer of trapping squirrels, about 15 in all. I had even more fund watching those squirrels haul ass when I released them!
Cat:
I have a love for most of God's creatures, but sorry, a cat is not on my list.
We've been noticing this cat that didn't belong in our part of the neighborhood. Guess he was taking up residence somewhere. One day I walked into the garage, open the door, and then see that damn cat take off. He has taken up residence in MY garage. One morning, Oscar decided to be sneaky and run out the door to the garage. Fortunately I had not opened the garage door yet. Oscar was running with a full head of steam toward the street before he realized the door was still down. Bam! He slid right into the door, since his little feet couldn't slow him down on the slick concrete. Of course I had to laugh at him. He looks up at me and gives me that look, "I smell something!" Oscar begins to follow his nose throughout the garage, till he has picked up that scent of that damn cat! I raise the garage door thinking that the cat would make a run for it. Oscar had him cornered and he wasn't going anywhere. I grab the water hose and work my way over to Oscar. Between Oscar and the water, the cat was losing the battle. Soaking wet, that cat finally made a run for it to the street with Oscar right behind!
We haven't seen that cat since!
Big Mouse or Rat?
Living next to the woods, we have had our fare share of field mice come wandering in. This week we got something a little bit bigger. I was sitting in my chair typing away, when I saw something scoot across the floor. It seems to be bigger than your average field mouse, but didn't see him again. The spousal unit began noticing some "trailings", but she said, "you know, these look bigger that what I'm used to seeing". Dog food started coming up missing, so we put the bowl on the counter. The next morning some of the dog food was in a small pile next to the bowl. It wasn't me, it wasn't the spousal unit, and it sure wasn't Oscar! Time for some traps! I decided to give small mouse traps a try. Before I could even set one out, the Spousal unit found a surprise in the laundry room. Fortunately for her, the critter wasn't moving. Posted this picture on Facebook, everybody agreed that we had ourselves a rat!
I'm hoping that he died from natural causes. I'd hate to think it was from the dog food, or worse my cooking! Mr. Rat has since taken a road trip with the trash. Hopefully none of his relatives stayed behind!
Possum:
Seems like just as soon as we get rid of one kind of critter, another one shows up. The spousal unit went to put the trash into the garbage can, which was empty, and she looked into the bottom of the can and found this:
This was one nasty looking possum! I'm guessing he climbed in during the night and got stuck. Every time we would look in he would start to hissing! Kinda felt bad for him, so I decided to give him a free pass. I rolled the can over to the woods, and leaned it over. Mr. Possum wasn't ready to come out! I finally dumped it over, the possum started walking to the woods, then he turned around, took one look at me, then let out this huge hiss! I think he just cussed at me! Free pass today my friend. Next visit, we play a game of baseball!
I have now sent up my prayers to God that the next critter he sends my way be edible!
As the neighborhood has grown, a series of fences were put up, mostly for privacy. Now almost every yard is surrounded by fencing. Sightings of natures animals have become fewer and fewer. Now, instead of seeing the graceful run of the deer and such, we get the night critters and other varmints.
Bullfrog:
I have had fish ponds that I have attempted to raise Koi and goldfish. The fish have come and gone, mostly from visits from the "night critters". Occasionally, I get my fare share of tadpoles. Some of these actually make it to the frog stage. After dark, these frogs get to singing, and at times loudly.
Ole Henry Dog is a curious fellow. He loves to chase anything that moves. Spiders, lizards, birds, and squirrels. One day he discovered something moving in the flower beds near the fish ponds. Low and behold, Henry has found my resident bullfrog. Henry got to digging, and sniffing, until he finally cornered that frog. Henry got him by the hind leg and drug him out into the open. Playtime! That frog never had a chance! Henry would grab him, then sling him up into the air, and then give chase!
A bullfrog is one of the hardest critters to actually kill. Been frogging a few times in my youth, with gigs and 22 rifles. End up catching a bunch, and they would all be alive till the very end of giving up their hind quarters. Somehow Ole Henry Dog was able to put this one out of his misery pretty quickly. The frog's revenge was making Henry foam at the mouth. After seeing this ole dog foam, I just about fell onto the ground from my uncontrolled laughter!
Squirrel:
If you live near some woods and you like to feed the birds, then more than likely you will have a run in with your share of squirrels. I had a family take up residence in my attic. They are determined little varmints, and they will find a way. I was determined to rid myself of these pesky critters!
On a shopping trip to Harbor Freight, I came across some varmint traps. Not wanting to spend a lot of money, I bought two of the small ones for about $15. I figured once a squirrel got into to one that he would be too dumb to figure out how to get out. Wrong! After a couple of weeks, all my bait was gone and no squirrels. I then had the idea to add another spring to the trap door, surely that would hold a trapped squirrel.
The next morning, I took Ole Henry Dog out for our morning ritual of finding a bush for him and me. I work my way over to side of the yard where I had set the trap. I'll be dang, the trap had a squirrel in it! I called for Henry and he came a running. We stood there, staring at each other, me and Henry looking at the squirrel, and the squirrel looking back at us. It was like a standoff in the old west, who would make the first move? All of a sudden, that pesky ole squirrel charged the trap door to the cage. The door busted open, and the squirrel literally took flight, landing on a nearby crepe myrtle, and up the tree, and over the fence he went. He left Ole Henry Dog and me just standing there, looking at each other, trying to figure out what just happened! Henry gave me that look of "well, I guess you better get a bigger trap". I started laughing, and I think Henry did too!
Eventually I did go and get me a bigger trap. Me, Henry and Oscar had quite a summer of trapping squirrels, about 15 in all. I had even more fund watching those squirrels haul ass when I released them!
Cat:
I have a love for most of God's creatures, but sorry, a cat is not on my list.
We've been noticing this cat that didn't belong in our part of the neighborhood. Guess he was taking up residence somewhere. One day I walked into the garage, open the door, and then see that damn cat take off. He has taken up residence in MY garage. One morning, Oscar decided to be sneaky and run out the door to the garage. Fortunately I had not opened the garage door yet. Oscar was running with a full head of steam toward the street before he realized the door was still down. Bam! He slid right into the door, since his little feet couldn't slow him down on the slick concrete. Of course I had to laugh at him. He looks up at me and gives me that look, "I smell something!" Oscar begins to follow his nose throughout the garage, till he has picked up that scent of that damn cat! I raise the garage door thinking that the cat would make a run for it. Oscar had him cornered and he wasn't going anywhere. I grab the water hose and work my way over to Oscar. Between Oscar and the water, the cat was losing the battle. Soaking wet, that cat finally made a run for it to the street with Oscar right behind!
We haven't seen that cat since!
Big Mouse or Rat?
Living next to the woods, we have had our fare share of field mice come wandering in. This week we got something a little bit bigger. I was sitting in my chair typing away, when I saw something scoot across the floor. It seems to be bigger than your average field mouse, but didn't see him again. The spousal unit began noticing some "trailings", but she said, "you know, these look bigger that what I'm used to seeing". Dog food started coming up missing, so we put the bowl on the counter. The next morning some of the dog food was in a small pile next to the bowl. It wasn't me, it wasn't the spousal unit, and it sure wasn't Oscar! Time for some traps! I decided to give small mouse traps a try. Before I could even set one out, the Spousal unit found a surprise in the laundry room. Fortunately for her, the critter wasn't moving. Posted this picture on Facebook, everybody agreed that we had ourselves a rat!
I'm hoping that he died from natural causes. I'd hate to think it was from the dog food, or worse my cooking! Mr. Rat has since taken a road trip with the trash. Hopefully none of his relatives stayed behind!
Possum:
Seems like just as soon as we get rid of one kind of critter, another one shows up. The spousal unit went to put the trash into the garbage can, which was empty, and she looked into the bottom of the can and found this:
This was one nasty looking possum! I'm guessing he climbed in during the night and got stuck. Every time we would look in he would start to hissing! Kinda felt bad for him, so I decided to give him a free pass. I rolled the can over to the woods, and leaned it over. Mr. Possum wasn't ready to come out! I finally dumped it over, the possum started walking to the woods, then he turned around, took one look at me, then let out this huge hiss! I think he just cussed at me! Free pass today my friend. Next visit, we play a game of baseball!
I have now sent up my prayers to God that the next critter he sends my way be edible!
Thursday, October 31, 2013
Cooking Disasters
With the Halloween season now over and the Thanksgiving season now upon us, thoughts of all the holiday cooking comes to mind. I thought I would share some of my favorite cooking disasters with you, They are not all necessarily related to Thanksgiving, but I am thankful that they didn't happen to me!
Turkey:
Got a neighbor that picked up an old electric smoker. He wanted to cook a turkey on it, but didn't know where to start. I told him to soak his wood chips for a couple of hours. Also told him to pat down the bird with olive oil, and coat the skin with his favorite spices and herbs.
A few hours later, I walk outside to see that the smoking was well on its way. The neighbor had set up the smoker in his driveway. There was so much smoke coming out of that smoker, I had to go check it out. I asked him how much wood chips did he put into the smoker. Answer: "I filled it up"! I went to lift the lid, Oh Lord! That turkey was literally black from all the smoke coming out of that smoker!
I lifted the smoker off the burner, and sure enough, the pan was full of mesquite chunks. Using some tongs, I pulled out as much as I could. Told the neighbor to let it go for a few hours, and to check the meat temperature to around 180 degrees.
Later in the day, I could tell that the cooking process must be complete, because no more smoke was coming out of the smoker. Neighbor came out and yelled "did you know that there was a turkey neck up in that thing?" I immediately think, OMG! I ask "what about the gab of innards"? Reply: "bag of what?" This guy is killing me.....
We go into the kitchen to inspect the bird. The skin has constricted tightly all over the bird from the hours of smoke. I take a kitchen knife and open up the neck area, and sure enough, there is a well done bag of turkey innards!
Learned my lesson. When someone asks how to cook something, I now start at ground Zero!
Ice Cream:
One Fourth of July, the neighbor with the pool decided he was gonna cook for the neighborhood. He had the pool, so the rest of us were always bringing the food. The menu was pork loin with navy beans, watermelon, and homemade ice cream.
The beans and pork were awesome. We couldn't wait for dessert! Cut the watermelon, only to discover that it was over ripe. No biggie, the ice cream was almost ready. The flavor of the day was butter pecan. My initial thought was dude, start with vanilla!
The motor finally stalled. The anticipation was building. The first scoops went to the young ladies in the crowd. They each took a bite, and they all had the weirdest looks on their faces. A couple more bites were all they could take. The adults took a nibble, only to discover that the ice cream was full of salt! What the hell????
The first item of suspect was the pecans that he put into the mixer. Nope, they were unsalted. We then examined the mixer. To our surprise the neighbor had plugged up the drain hole, since he didn't want salt water draining into his sink. You gotta be kidding me! The salt that was added to the mixer eventually melted the ice, creating salt water, which worked its way into the cream bucket. Never in my years have I ever had this happen!
Always remember to check the ice to salt ratio, and make sure the drain plug ain't stopped up!
Stuffed Bell Peppers:
Young Son decided he wanted to cook for the family. He decided on a five cheese macaroni casserole and stuffed bell peppers. That night, I went to the store and got all of the ingredients. I asked Young Son if he wanted to go ahead and do all the food prep that night and just put the pans in the oven in the morning. Young Son said, no, that he wanted to do it all fresh. I asked again, response: Dad, "its just a recipe".
Next day, Young Son got busy in the kitchen. He was very organized. Mom came in to help. but Young Son said "no thanks Mom, its just a recipe".
I must say, it sure looked impressive. The mac and cheese looked absolutely delicious. The five cheeses did not disappoint the taste buds. I get to the stuffed bell pepper, and it was cooked to perfection. After a few bites, I notice that there is a whole lot of rice in every bite, but very little of the other ingredients. I ask, "son, you sure you got this right?" "Yes, Dad, I followed the instructions" was his reply.
On further inspection of the recipe, it did ask for one cup of rice. One cup of COOKED rice. Whoops!
The meal was enjoyed by all. Young Son took the ribbing really well, considering "it was just a recipe"!
Turkey:
Got a neighbor that picked up an old electric smoker. He wanted to cook a turkey on it, but didn't know where to start. I told him to soak his wood chips for a couple of hours. Also told him to pat down the bird with olive oil, and coat the skin with his favorite spices and herbs.
A few hours later, I walk outside to see that the smoking was well on its way. The neighbor had set up the smoker in his driveway. There was so much smoke coming out of that smoker, I had to go check it out. I asked him how much wood chips did he put into the smoker. Answer: "I filled it up"! I went to lift the lid, Oh Lord! That turkey was literally black from all the smoke coming out of that smoker!
I lifted the smoker off the burner, and sure enough, the pan was full of mesquite chunks. Using some tongs, I pulled out as much as I could. Told the neighbor to let it go for a few hours, and to check the meat temperature to around 180 degrees.
Later in the day, I could tell that the cooking process must be complete, because no more smoke was coming out of the smoker. Neighbor came out and yelled "did you know that there was a turkey neck up in that thing?" I immediately think, OMG! I ask "what about the gab of innards"? Reply: "bag of what?" This guy is killing me.....
We go into the kitchen to inspect the bird. The skin has constricted tightly all over the bird from the hours of smoke. I take a kitchen knife and open up the neck area, and sure enough, there is a well done bag of turkey innards!
Learned my lesson. When someone asks how to cook something, I now start at ground Zero!
Ice Cream:
One Fourth of July, the neighbor with the pool decided he was gonna cook for the neighborhood. He had the pool, so the rest of us were always bringing the food. The menu was pork loin with navy beans, watermelon, and homemade ice cream.
The beans and pork were awesome. We couldn't wait for dessert! Cut the watermelon, only to discover that it was over ripe. No biggie, the ice cream was almost ready. The flavor of the day was butter pecan. My initial thought was dude, start with vanilla!
The motor finally stalled. The anticipation was building. The first scoops went to the young ladies in the crowd. They each took a bite, and they all had the weirdest looks on their faces. A couple more bites were all they could take. The adults took a nibble, only to discover that the ice cream was full of salt! What the hell????
The first item of suspect was the pecans that he put into the mixer. Nope, they were unsalted. We then examined the mixer. To our surprise the neighbor had plugged up the drain hole, since he didn't want salt water draining into his sink. You gotta be kidding me! The salt that was added to the mixer eventually melted the ice, creating salt water, which worked its way into the cream bucket. Never in my years have I ever had this happen!
Always remember to check the ice to salt ratio, and make sure the drain plug ain't stopped up!
Stuffed Bell Peppers:
Young Son decided he wanted to cook for the family. He decided on a five cheese macaroni casserole and stuffed bell peppers. That night, I went to the store and got all of the ingredients. I asked Young Son if he wanted to go ahead and do all the food prep that night and just put the pans in the oven in the morning. Young Son said, no, that he wanted to do it all fresh. I asked again, response: Dad, "its just a recipe".
Next day, Young Son got busy in the kitchen. He was very organized. Mom came in to help. but Young Son said "no thanks Mom, its just a recipe".
I must say, it sure looked impressive. The mac and cheese looked absolutely delicious. The five cheeses did not disappoint the taste buds. I get to the stuffed bell pepper, and it was cooked to perfection. After a few bites, I notice that there is a whole lot of rice in every bite, but very little of the other ingredients. I ask, "son, you sure you got this right?" "Yes, Dad, I followed the instructions" was his reply.
On further inspection of the recipe, it did ask for one cup of rice. One cup of COOKED rice. Whoops!
The meal was enjoyed by all. Young Son took the ribbing really well, considering "it was just a recipe"!
Sunday, October 27, 2013
Chevron Chicken on a Stick
I've heard about it, read about it, been tempted a few times, but never actually stopped at the Chevron near the Square for their famous chicken on a stick.
The Chevron station is located near the Square, at the intersection of Lamar and University Avenue. Abners is located across the street. Stopping there in the middle of the day is not an option. The experience has to be late at night on game day. Students, for years, have been stopping by here before venturing deeper into the nightlife further into the happenings in and around the Square. Always short of cash, its a quick, cheap fried treat all college students enjoy before blowing the rest of their weekend budget in one of the many watering holes that line the square.
Sometime this year, I put together a short informal bucket list for the remainder of the year. At the top of the list was this Chicken on a stick experience. Been to Oxford several times this year already, and it was either way too late in the night, or the line was out the door. On this day, we called it early, leaving with just a few minutes left in the third quarter, and the outcome of the game was a certainty.
With all out tailgate stuff packed up and stuffed in the KIA, it was time. I figured with the game still in play and the students already enjoying the Homecoming festivities at the Frat houses and off campus, surely the line would not be long.
The anticipation was building. It only got worse when the flashlight cop stopped my progress at an intersection. It was almost like he knew that I was on a mission, and he did everything in his power to delay my destiny! Students and fans were allowed to pass in all directions, taking their time, slowing crossing the intersection, and encouraging others to follow. Then cars in all the other lanes were allowed to pass. I kept busy by flexing my foot and ankle like I was revving up the engine waiting for the green flag to go!
Finally! We arrived, and YES! a short line! I pulled into one of the gas pumps closest to Lamar. I walked into the Chevron and was immediately was aroused by the smell of that aroma coming out of the food counter. They had chicken strips, chicken nuggets, jojo taters, and the one item that has been on my want list all season, the chicken on a stick!
While in line, I did a quick look around. I noticed a sign outside announcing the newly installed "Beer Cave" with the coldest beer in town. This is a new novelty in Oxford. They have had beer for sale for years, but except for restaurants, it had always been sold hot. But not anymore! The order of the day was an ice cold 6-12 pack of your favorite brand and something fried out of the food counter. The young feller in front of me had his beer in hand. Clerk rang up the purchase and only asked for his birth date. Must have been a trick question because the clerk didn't look like too much of a math whiz to figure it out!
Got my order, back in the car, and off we went. To my delight, the treat was all fried chicken and stick! None of that filler of onion, pickle and tater. This treat was not a disappointment. Best fried chicken late night treat I'd had in years! Too bad I was driving, a beer to wash it down would have made it even better!
Next time you are in Oxford for a Football Saturday night game, stop by and give it a try. Another item off my list!
The Chevron station is located near the Square, at the intersection of Lamar and University Avenue. Abners is located across the street. Stopping there in the middle of the day is not an option. The experience has to be late at night on game day. Students, for years, have been stopping by here before venturing deeper into the nightlife further into the happenings in and around the Square. Always short of cash, its a quick, cheap fried treat all college students enjoy before blowing the rest of their weekend budget in one of the many watering holes that line the square.
Sometime this year, I put together a short informal bucket list for the remainder of the year. At the top of the list was this Chicken on a stick experience. Been to Oxford several times this year already, and it was either way too late in the night, or the line was out the door. On this day, we called it early, leaving with just a few minutes left in the third quarter, and the outcome of the game was a certainty.
With all out tailgate stuff packed up and stuffed in the KIA, it was time. I figured with the game still in play and the students already enjoying the Homecoming festivities at the Frat houses and off campus, surely the line would not be long.
The anticipation was building. It only got worse when the flashlight cop stopped my progress at an intersection. It was almost like he knew that I was on a mission, and he did everything in his power to delay my destiny! Students and fans were allowed to pass in all directions, taking their time, slowing crossing the intersection, and encouraging others to follow. Then cars in all the other lanes were allowed to pass. I kept busy by flexing my foot and ankle like I was revving up the engine waiting for the green flag to go!
Finally! We arrived, and YES! a short line! I pulled into one of the gas pumps closest to Lamar. I walked into the Chevron and was immediately was aroused by the smell of that aroma coming out of the food counter. They had chicken strips, chicken nuggets, jojo taters, and the one item that has been on my want list all season, the chicken on a stick!
While in line, I did a quick look around. I noticed a sign outside announcing the newly installed "Beer Cave" with the coldest beer in town. This is a new novelty in Oxford. They have had beer for sale for years, but except for restaurants, it had always been sold hot. But not anymore! The order of the day was an ice cold 6-12 pack of your favorite brand and something fried out of the food counter. The young feller in front of me had his beer in hand. Clerk rang up the purchase and only asked for his birth date. Must have been a trick question because the clerk didn't look like too much of a math whiz to figure it out!
Got my order, back in the car, and off we went. To my delight, the treat was all fried chicken and stick! None of that filler of onion, pickle and tater. This treat was not a disappointment. Best fried chicken late night treat I'd had in years! Too bad I was driving, a beer to wash it down would have made it even better!
Next time you are in Oxford for a Football Saturday night game, stop by and give it a try. Another item off my list!
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